****TRIGGER*******
Mention of Sui.







Has anyone contacted their T over the wknd when they were having an emergency or feeling really really depressed?

My T contradicted himself & idk I'm really not sure I should reach out to him...
The past 2 weeks have been great for me buttttt like always down I come again. I knew it was gonna happen so I made a point to ask him 3 sessions ago about wknd contact & he said if I'm feeling Sui or THAT bad depressed to go to the nearest ER. & told me that he needs his space too. (& he'll prolly be drinking on the weekends, haha)

Then....yesterday's session I felt it. I felt the down coming on, I told him and he said you can email me over the wind but it's NOT GuARANTEED when ill anwser (like I email now, he may get back to me sun) is what he was saying is a possibility. But he said he'll talk to me, & hopefully that 'works' till our next session BUT he said if after we hang up or done emailing that he feels strongly I will do Sui...he WiLL call the police to my house.
I said if he does that, our relationship is over...to which he replied, it usually is.

Idk if I should email him . I DON'T want to talk to him on the phone. I do want to give him his space he deserves but I go so low these days it's scary & I've been in bed all day crying off & on (it's 2:30pm here). I really don't have anyone else to talk to or I would do that.
But if I did IDk what he would say that would make me feel better. It's not like he's gonna offer sat appt! Why bother him when nothing he says is gonna make me feel better :/. Idk....I hate hate hate my life & I kind of hate my T.

This is SO unreasonable, I know...but I just wish he would come hang out with me, even play a computer game over the Internet, or pick me up & take me to the hosp. ANYTHING. Wow I'm really losing it.

Sorry everyone I just can't get stable & dealing w/ T & all the emotions that go along with it is too much sometimes. Thanks for listening.

Oh & I guess I forgot he I am on his Facebook (along w/ some other clients) && I posted last night 'what goes up, will come crashing down. It always does' and I KNoW he saw it. Any pics I post he comments on like oh I saw you posted a pic of you and your kids at the park! That looked nice. & he says it's nice to see what *some* of his clients are up to via fb.
So, point being, he knows I'm already going or am down....
I wonder if he's expecting an email.
I wish he'd reach out & email ME. ..I've never contacted him off hours or weekend ever!....