Quote:
Originally Posted by Improving
I wanted to draw on the communal wisdom of PC, if that's ok
I asked my T for a picture of her eyes. Sounds a bit strange  but after 2+ years of steadfastly Never Looking At T or Anywhere Near T, I'm finding there's a part of me that is probably too little for words and feels safest by looking into her eyes. I've been much more grown up in sessions recently (yay!) but find that afterwards I feel I've lost out on not spending that time just being with T. So I thought this would be a good way to make up for it.
T said of course (  ), and texted me a picture the same day. The only thing is... it's kind of scary. She looks very very serious and is fully made up, and it's just not very... motherly! I think I want a picture where I know she's looking at me. I very nearly wrote back and said 'thanks, but could I have one where you're not dressed to kill and about to seduce someone?!' but I thought that might be too hurtful. Our relationship is very robust, but I don't want to hurt her gratuitously. I'm aware that she probably has her own insecurities about her looks and wanted one where she thought she looked nice (she talked about 'looking' for one). I also don't want to seem ungrateful- she said yes, and she did it immediately, when it usually takes her weeks to get round to these things. These are behaviours I want to reinforce!
Should I shut up and make the best of this picture? If not, how can I get the picture I would like in a way that doesn't cause too much fuss? What would PC do?...
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This might be another way in which it is difficult to reproduce what goes on in the therapy "room" out in real life. You were probably looking for the same thing I love about my T. eyes...the concern, the I'm listening intently to you look.... Its more than a look...its a feeling that you get when you are in the moment... not sure you will be able to recapture that in a photo...
You are lucky to have a photo. My t. doesn't have any photos on the website or anywhere. I would like to have one just to remember when we are finished therapy.