My mom and I have always had a volatile relationship. We are close but yet I'm the first person she seems to take everything out on. That is how she is, she finds someone to dislike/hate. Everyone takes a turn being thrown under the bus by her, more so me as I live with her. And boy can she be mean.
Right now I live at home. I had to move back due to money. When I got back I offered her money and told her I'd help pay for things but she told me to save my money. So I did. Then she got hooked up with this worthless piece of crap of a boyfriend and he basically bled her dry and still is doing so. He is very mentally, emotionally and verbally abusive. She won't leave him and won't make him pay. So again I tried to give her money and again she told me to save my money. The thing is that every time she gets angry she throws a fit and tells me the list of things she is paying for me, which makes me so mad because it isn't like I haven't offered a million times to give her money.
The other day she got mad because she was the one having to deal with my taxes so I told her that I would be more than happy to take care of them and that I had planned to. Last night I told her that I would take them in and take care of them. She then told me what a selfish person, not the word she used, I was and she couldn't believe that I would take what little bit of money from her she was entitled to for helping me out.
I get married in August so I won't have to put up with her too much longer but my nerves are starting to become raw so to speak.
She is extremely unhappy and takes it out on everyone around her. Her mood can change at the drop of a hat.
My question(s)s are, how do i deal with her? Do I give her money even though when I try she tells me not to? How much do I give her? What do I do if she tells me no, especially for the next time she decides to throw it in my face? I feel like I can't win with her. If I don't give her money she gripes about how I'm living there rent free and not helping for a thing, even though I do clean house for her and have a part time job. If I try and give her money then she tells me to keep it and save it.