I'm glad to see you didn't delete your post. One step at a time, and you will eventually be able to "spill your guts" like the rest of us, if you choose to go that route. You noticed that some of us are more free with posting than others, and I think it's just a matter of choice on each person's part of what they are comfy with.
Hang in here, FuzzyBear, and keep trying to post, bit by bit. I'm always happy to see you haven't deleted.