masturbation is a healthy outlet for young males and older males as well. we do know to keep these things private (most of us do). I still think you are being too hard on yourself and condemning yourself because since then you heard about beastiality and connect it to what you did. don't even go there, at 12, you may have had some secrets about your actions, but fully understanding it was a social misconduct would not have been easily grasped at that age. Now it's like wow I must have been perverted at that time. No,no, still sexual curosity of a very young person. You feeling so sorry about this proves to me, this is a young man with integrity and you need to forgive yourself. It won't happen again...your grown now and know the social graces.
bj