wow. Grief, IMO, can be the single most overwhelming emotion because there absolutely no way the situation surrounding it can be changed.

I'm so sorry for your recent loss and the one pending.

I also completely understand why and how you would chose to be mute about it. I imagine it is very hard to open your mind to what is happening without fearing a dam of emotion will burst.

You will speak when you are ready.

Grief takes many forms, and we all get to experience it the way we want. I definitely wouldn't put any pressure at all on yourself to speak unless and until you want to.

Peace to you.