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Old Feb 08, 2012, 02:28 PM
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amandalouise amandalouise is offline
Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: 8CS / NYS / USA
Posts: 9,171
Quote:
Originally Posted by WelcomeToTheJungle View Post
..and he is sure I have depression and OCD, and possible schizophrenia/psychosis. He seemed quite concerned actually..
Surprisingly I am feeling positive about this because I finally have a name for everything that is going on. My depression is getting worse though, along with the psychosis, and the school well-being team don't even know what to do. I went today and all she said was "think happy thoughts", I said I just couldn't, and she didn't understand, so :/

The thing is I can relate to every symptom of depression, and most of sz. They think it's adolescent-onset.

I know I sound ridiculous. Like every other whiny teen around. But I'm not lazy, I have lost every bit of motivation I had, and I want it back! I used to be so driven, a fighter. Now I just feel like curling up into a ball and crying, or taking a bunch of pills. I think about it a lot, but I just can't do it to my family. I can't focus or concentrate, I'm scared of myself, I'm scared of Fang (who is showing up a lot more now) and I don't see any hope in anything anymore. I hate this. I wish I could be like everyone else, complaining because they can't go out on Saturday or because they can't find the right dress for next year's prom or whatever. But no, I worry about if I will even reach my 16th birthday.

I don't even know why I am writing this, just wanted somewhere to say what's on my mind and what happened. I don't feel sorry for myself. Heck, It's the complete opposite. Sorry if I'm annoying.

~ WTTJ
I am so happy for you. finally you were able to get diagnosed and now you have the answers you were looking for and know whats going on and now it can be treated. hope you will feel better soon.