"now im rambling and my mind wont stoppppp 0.o"

I hear you, I can realte to you ("Up and down and up and down" ... lol. Yep) and I feel for you.
Bipolar is crazy, mad and its silly and ridiculous but I wouldnt have it any other way. I love my BPd and i try to look after it. It's your weather. last week I felt like a spring breeze but today, there's a storm brewin.
I am trying to pay a lot more attention to myself at the moment and hopefully try to control some of the symptoms. I am 48, have had this all my life and have just had my first major, major blowout. BIG TIME Learn about yourself and save your money for a rainy day..
All The Best. o_0