Thanks to both of you, that really helps.

Lynn, Thanks for the tip off about the LGBTQ group. I might repost, but I figured this fit more here because it's less about a same sex thing and more about the actual relationship. And part of the reason this is so weird for me is because I'm usually extremely into SM. I know it from both sides, and I know how exciting it can be, and it's never been associated with "bad stuff" for me. Though maybe some stuff coming up in T is making it re-associate as bad? huh... i might have to give that some thought.

Harley, Yeah, I think we do need to talk. We already talked about what we like in bed, and even drew up a list. I'm more hardcore than she is! Huh, maybe I need to consider this too... But I think I'm going to take your advice and talk to her about why I'm so nervous. I do keep my guard up around her, and I've been trying to fix that. I personally hate being treated like a glass statue, so it's really frustrating me that I'm doing that to her.

Thank you both again for your input. Gives me lots to think on.