Someone like me can't handle watching, reading, or listening to the news, not even for a moment, for those few moments can trigger and cripple me with hopelessness from all the evil and suffering in this world. I shouldn't have tested myself, but foolishly, I felt strong enough (maybe even invincible) to do so, and now everything hurts for me. My mind is bruised black and blue, and in a downward spiral of badly wanting to numb myself. I was pretty useless today and marred two weeks of perfect training with a missed key session. Damn ####ing dis-ordered sensitivities. The only thing I can do is to hang on to the good inside me and keep going towards the light. Too tired and weak to do anything tonight, but I will try to turn this downward cycle around through meditation and yoga in the morning.