Dear T -

I don't know how I'm going to make it through the rest of my life. A teacher once told me that someday we kids will wake up in middle age and realize in a panic that life is half over. Now that I am there, why do I feel relieved that half of this disaster is behind me?

Things will never be right. T, you will never love me the way I love you. You will always love your kids more than me. My own dad will never really care. I have to watch my "real" dad have a charmed life. My dad lives in luxury among friends with wife #3 while we grew up struggling with little and often no support from him.

T, you will never be able to make things right. You might love me in a way, but is it enough. Will anything ever be enough?