I am so sorry that you have been betrayed and it certainly must not feel good to be treated like someone's spare equipment. Fortunately there are many men who are not jerks and do have the capacity to love and commit. It sometimes takes them longer and they have to learn how to treat a woman. Right now it is best to take care of yourself and if possible spend some time with some of your girlfriends. Be good to yourself so you can heal from this and move on to someone better. He didn't deserve you anyway.