It sounds as if you have done everything you can to reach him and if you have not got thru by now, there is little more you can do to improve his situation. your husband is right. i know it is difficult considering his circumstances, but he will only continue his current lifestyle knowing that he has you to fall back on for support.

has he got therapy yet? you could make one last ditch effort. Therapy and strict conditions for living in your home..job/returning to school with a plan to become independent in x amount of time...(you dont state his age but im under the impression that he is an adult at this point) if he doesnt follow these guidelines he will have to find a new place to live.

again, i know his past makes it difficult, but you have to focus on his future in becoming a successful independent adult and his current lifepath is not heading that direction. you can take steps to guide him there, but if he rejects these offers and support, you do not have to be party in watching him destroy himself.

good luck...