Is that really the question? I have had a family member kill himself. I know the mess that is left behind to clean up -. Literally and otherwise. I also know what it is like to want to die. I get both sides. And, I have had great therapy and now I want to live. In the end, it doesn't matter if it is selfish or not. It destroys people and families forever. Shouldn't that be a top consideration? Not trying to ruin your question. Just want to add a dose of reality and reframe things-
dazeofdolphins