((((eastcoaster))) I really know how you feel. I wish I had some insight for you.. just some hugs! 
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"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."
"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
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