Thanks for the replies.

Roadie - ok, I'll have to see if I can get help from her. I have seen her in the chat rooms before.

Rohag - 1. not at all, 2. It's been up and down, 3. I've considered other occupations. The skills necessary for my job are skills that are completely useless to have anywhere else. When I first got the job, I was a little less down because I wasn't expecting to find a job at all. But, this job only offered a graveyard shift then, and I ended up getting stuck with that for 2 years now with zero chance to change shifts. I wish there was something that I was good at or even something that I sucked at but I knew that I wanted to pursue.

When I was in high school, my counselor was trying to help me with one of those career tests to find out what I wanted/could do for a career. I told her that I have thought of everything in the world and there's nothing out there that fits me. She thought I was crazy and said I couldn't possibly have thought of everything. To me, its like there's only so many things out there and I am very limited.

cornercurio - I am horrible at faking good moods and I wouldn't want to anyway, it feels so pointless to me. I don't want to have to just lie and simply try to get by. I never speak in real life unless I am specifically requested to, so I am not interacting with my co-workers at all. Right now I'm sitting at a table with 3 other people, they are all way older than me and were in the military, and were small town country type people. They are always having a good time teasing each other with jokes and poking fun out of small things in the work but I never laugh with them and they just think I'm weird. I hate this situation and just want to die.