Besides sad, I am scared. My employment has been scarce. I did not do well on my last job assignment. Now, I'm scared to go out on another assignment. Also, I am not so well. I have an orthopedic problem and it, now, hinders me, which is kind of new. I feel like I just got much older practically overnight. I'm sore and distressed, mentally and physically.

Mainly, I am extremely depressed about my potential to make things better. At times, I am in despair. A doctor has advised and encouraged me to apply for SSDI. I'm so intimidated by that whole process. Meanwhile, I come on the computer just briefly, because I get too much pain pretty quickly.