This is a very interesting idea, which is why I have started a new thread.

My T has admitted there were times when she never expected to see me again.

On the other hand, I'm sure there have been times when I have talked about leaving when she knew it wasn't going to happen.

Once she said, "I think you feel a need to punish me, and leaving is your way of doing that. And maybe that is what you need to do right now." I think she just wanted me to talk it through, but what I heard was, "I'll see you again when you've wised up." Yet she wasn't angry.

That triggered my paranoia and I wondered, does she want me to go or not? Cos I'll do whatever she doesn't want.