Hi!
You've been thrown into a job without any training. Naturally you are going to feel bad. But as you find out what the job is about, you will get a handle on it and feel better.
The same applies to working for a living for the first time.
You've got a lot going on. Concentrate on surviving and these things will get better by themselves.
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Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc.
Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
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