Hi PreacherHeckler, are you a moderator?

Yes, therapy is a subject dear to my heart! I love it when it works, and I think it's important and valuable. And I find myself doing without it for long periods, but I always end up going back! I think these forums are a great way to compare notes with other people going through something similar. I don't know anyone IRL who is also in therapy right now, so I'm relying on the forum a lot these days.

But a lot of things can and do go wrong in therapy. I've always believed that there's no such thing as a harmless bad therapist, so when I read anything that sets of alarm bells, yeah - I respond. That's kind of what the forum is for - response, yes?

I've had incompetent therapists, and I've had unethical ones. They can waste your time and money, and if you're in a vulnerable spot they can seriously set you back emotionally. If I think there's anything about my experience that can help others, I like to offer it up.

Sometimes I see people not sticking up for themselves against their Ts. A therapist who wants his client to "feed her obsession" with him? A therapist who is constantly answering the phone, typing on their laptop, or filing their nails in session? A therapist who says "I love you" to their client? These things are really awful to read about.

It's painful to see the confusion and distress that Ts who lack boundaries can create in the people on this forum. Here's one that stuck out for me recently: a client wrote a termination later to her T, apologizing for not being a better client. That's something no one EVER has to do. The burden of ethical treatment and every other kind of responsible care is on the therapist, not the client. That a client would feel so disoriented and saddened by what they've been going through at the hands of a poor therapist, that THEY would apologize to that person, just floors me. I try to offer sympathy - maybe it comes off as anger. But it's anger at the therapist, not the people on this forum.

As for my writing style, I'm pretty sure I haven't violated any official or unofficial rules of posting here - otherwise my posts would have been removed.

So in the end, I'm just another internet stranger, and my input and advice is exactly as valuable (or as useless) as anyone else's here. I often say Your Mileage May Vary.