I really identify with this, too. I have friends but none of them the kind of 'close' relationships I see other people having. I've always felt misunderstood, like an outsider... I've always felt on a different 'wavelength' to most people. Since going to therapy I'm learning that I've been/am emotionally distant. I don't let people in. I'm shy, but people think me aloof. For months I thought I was letting my T 'in', but I wasn't, not really. Only recently have I realised I actually am now starting to open up - a bit of a learning experience, and kinda scary! Hoping that eventually I'll be able to properly connect with people in real life, and not just with my therapist

But ugh, gym class! Bad memories! Always amongst the last to be picked - and I do still very much feel that way in social situations, like I'm always a hanger on, or tagging along, or a pity invite...

((((hugs to everyone, I feel your pain))))