I am a mother to two children who lived in an abusive relationship for over ten years it took me a while to get out and I am now living with my new partner although we have only been in a relationship for a short time. I love him so much its unreal but I just do the daftest of things which always put the relationship in danger I don't do them to hurt him or to push him away but it seems that is what I do all the time. I believe he loves me I just feel hes always up to something this started when I found messages on his phone but I now can't get them out of my head. I have had it really rough and have a councillor who is trying to help but then I feel she is just getting to me all I want is to know I am not alone out there that others are in the same situation and just a friendly chat someone to listen when I am at my lowest to tell me all will be ok and for me to be able to do the same for others because as my councillor is saying its good to talk but not that easy when your scared to open your mouth for fear that he will leave if he doesn't like what you say and my new partner is not violent