argh! That is frustrating! My mom has a similar bad habit.

The hard thing was getting myself out of the habit of believing & depending upon her in the first place. While it sure would be nice to get help, I can't depend on it ~ so I don't plan on any help to begin with now. It has helped me a lot to get out of this habit of dependence.

I'd recommend that you do the same. Work these things by yourself ~ pointless to continue the cycle of dependence and resentment. My mom didn't enjoy me letting go of the cycle, but it's a lot less tumultuous now. Best wishes to you!