Not true. I have tried to manage my own mental health my entire life (mostly) on my own. I'm quite independent and would not even ask for care unless I thought I really need it. Right now, I need it. I have handled years upon years of sexual abuse, practically being homeless, undergrad, my Masters, being a PhD student, two surgeries, and leaving an almost 10 year relationship without much support. I rarely reach out for help and I need help now.

I've tried counseling before, several times. I made a therapist cry talking about my abuse because he just couldn't take talking about it. Other counselors weren't helpful and I have been misdiagnosed.

I am not insisting on being hopeless. I *feel* hopeless. Feeling and actually being hopeless are two different things. When reaching out for help is my last ditch effort and it took a lot for me to admit I even need help, I feel completely dumped on. If the p-doc felt the way you described, she would have told me. Plus, doctors take risks every single time they write a prescription. The p-doc should be one place where you feel safe, feel as if there is open dialogue and honesty, and feel as if there is always hope. I think my main thing is that I left myself be vulnerable and tried to deal with my Bipolar with someone who is supposed to be a professional, and I left feeling as if there is no hope for me. NO ONE with mental illness should feel that way when they are seeking help.