Hi Carrie.

I thought I'd throw in my own two cents since it has been awhile that I have cut as well.

Ideas of my son never stopped me, because I thought it had nothing to do with him. One day I really LOOKED at the damage that I had done to myself and I was horrified. I realized that anyone could actually see what I had done: like my upcoming surgery. The knowledge that those scars will be there when I die scared me.

That was the idea, but maintaining that thought isn't as easy sometimes. I either go to mentally or physically, a place I feel safe. Most of the time it is my T's office. Sometimes if it is really bad, I call him and he gets me focused again. There have been occasions where he has come out to the waiting area and simply found me sitting there. I don't ask to talk to him, I just sit there. He knows why I am there and usually tries to talk to me if he can.

The meds that I am on have helped slightly. The main thing is being somewhere I feel safe, where no one can hurt me in any way.

I hope this helps you out. I wish you and the rest of us the strength to continue this fight.

xoxox

Mary Alice