Hi hamster (and others)

When I have a psychotic episode either during mania or depression...I am just really scared. I think people are watching me and I'm always watching my back and accuse people close to me of things they're not really doing.

No, I don't really notice it's happening, just my life suddenly becomes very scary...but when it is pointed out to me by someone I trust, "hey spyder....that's not normal...." I can see it for what it is. Not that that makes the psychosis go away, not at all, but I know that it is not "really reality" if that makes sense.