Welcome {purple] Linds -and Cabin! You will find most all of us here have issues... and we come here for help and to help each other.

I agree with Cabin -- need to distance yourself from these type of ppl at least for a while... catch your breath and clear you head (the best you can.)

You need to find a professional sounding board... someone who doesn't allow you just lean, but gives you true support to help you begin to stand.

Come back, and post often...

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>