The problem with thinking we can do these things in some sort of linear, one-thing-at-a-time process, is that all the issues you mention are generally interrelated. Childhood issues impact our identity and relationships, and our relationships can trigger childhood issues, and all those things can trigger anxiety and stress -- so a skilled therapist will help us work on these things simultaneously by encouraging steps toward less dependence on the therapist and more dependence on other relationships. A therapist who tries to push patients "out of the nest" without helping us learn how to establish healthier relationships while we're still in treatment isn't any better than a therapist who is content to allow patients to stay in treatment forever without evidence of growth and change.
I'm not saying your T is at either extreme, CCBG. Just saying that all these issues overlap and impact each other, so they can't be effectively treated in a linear fashion that will allow you to work through your childhood issues before you tackle relationship and identity issues.