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niko851 said:
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My suggestion(s) to you: Just be there for your husband. Trust me when I say that having the FULL support of just ONE person truly does make the world of difference. He will have you to fully trust and he will know you are there for him. It sounds like you are a great spouse as-is; and for that, I commend you.</font>

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Me again

Niko is sooooo right!!! BP is so very hard on ~both~ the one with the disorder and their loved one/s; SO, etc.

In my case, being single, my main support is my mother and without her during these years, I don't know what I would have done.

Our behavior to people who are unfamiliar with BP may seem totally unfathomable and, as Niko said, there's no "one size fits all" in how exactly that behavior comes out.

For me (and perhaps you've seen one or more of these in your husband) - I totally isolate in the house, unplug the phone ~and~ the answering machine; I cry over nothing and sometimes rock back and forth in despair; then there are periods where I sleep almost days on end as escape, abuse meds (ie sleeping pills) to keep myself "knocked out" ; I despair of EVER being well again (and here is where the support is a biggie - my mother and pdoc keep reminding me "You've gone through this before and you always get well.")

I lose my appetite and lose weight (some people gain weight - again - very individual); I obsess over tragic "what ifs" that could happen (basically have to quit watching the news)....well, I'm sure you get the idea. Each of us could give their own list of symptoms.

When I first became ill, my then-husband and mother had no idea what was going on (neither did I). My husband never did really educate himself but my mother really read and talked to other people (being amazed at finding the very people she was talking to ~also~ lived with some type of mental disorder).

I applaud you as well for coming here to look for answers/help.

I'm always willing to accept private messages.