First I'd like to say that I have never come onto the internet asking for advice like this before because it is an extremely touchy subject. However, as long as I stay anonymous I think the online advice will be helpful.

This is not something I ever wanted to discuss with anyone other than my boyfriend but here we go.

My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. Other than the issues I'll tell you guys about today, we have the perfect relationship. We met each other in a bar two years ago in fell in love rather quickly, and then I moved to a major east coast city and he followed me there. We were apart for about four months during the moves but we were still dating and would talk on the phone for hours, that sort of thing. When we moved in we had been dating for about six months. We make each other laugh, we balance each other out, when I say we are in love, I mean it. We've told each other we want to get married one day (will probably give it another five years or so) and have kids, and we have told each other we want another life together. We are always hanging out, we don't like being apart.

Now here comes the bad.

While reading this, keep in mind that I am about five feet tall and have weighed between 115-125 lbs throughout this relationship.

About a year into our relationship there came a day when I used my boyfriend's phone to search for a restaurant. Please note, I wasn't snooping, my phone was in the other room and he literally handed his phone to me and told me to do a Google search on his phone. So I did and you know how smartphones list your recent searches when you start typing, well one of his was "big cuties". I thought, hmm, wonder what that is, but didn't really think anything of it, and life went on.

About a week later my phone was dead and I needed to call someone. Once again my boyfriend (who was driving at the time) handed me his phone and told me to use it. When I unlocked the screen, to my surprise, there was a picture of a huge women, like 300 lb woman, on his phone and she was in lingerie. I immediately turned the screen off and told him I'd call the person later. I was in shock and was silent until we got home. When we got home this I finally asked him why that was on his phone. He laughed and shrugged and said his friend sent it to him as a joke. But here's the catch, the website was "big cuties" and I remembered seeing that search on his phone before, so standing right in front of him I looked under his phone history. He did not do anything to stop me. Unfortunately, I discovered that he looked up fat girls ALL THE TIME, like multiple times a week and it wasn't just that site there were some other gross "fat girl" related terms in there.

Following that I cried, was in shock, etc etc. He kept trying to make up excuses and finally admitted he didn't know why he liked that stuff and that he was happy with me and loved me and he would never look at it again. Obviously he was very very embarrassed.

So some months went on, I tried to forget it, but I kept an eye on his web history. I had never snooped before but now my trust was broken.

Then, something else happened. We're now about a year and a half into the relationship. We're laying in bed one night and my boyfriend gets a phone call from a number not saved in his phone. He answers it, I hear a girl say "Hello?" and she says his name and he immediately hangs up the phone. I'm ask why he hung up and he says it hit the button on accident so I'm like well call her back and he says he'll do it later. The whole time he acts strange.

The next morning I pick up his phone and look to see if he called her back, and he actually DELETED her number. So I confront him about it, he finally says it's his ex girlfriend who has been calling him and bothering him. If this is true why not just tell me that instead of hide it?

So I dig into his phone history because I'm not satisfied with the shifty lies. Long story short, yes, it's his ex, who he dated for three years and HE HAD BEEN CALLING HER and talking to her for hours like at least once a month. I also found out he had visited her when we had gone back home to see family and had lied to me about it saying he wanted to hang out alone with his guy friends!

So, this is the second big lie, I threaten to break up, he freaks out, tells me how much he loves me, blah blah blah, says he'll never talk to her again.

He hasn't. He does love me. I know it. My friends, his friends, and even my Mom think he didn't tell me about her because he didn't want me to get mad and he says they were just friends, and everyone including myself doesn't see him as cheater. He is the nicest guy in the world, blah blah blah, very committed to me, etc etc.

You should all know he cheated on his last girlfriend with this ex he's lied to me about. However it was after he had decided to break up with the girl he had been dating.

So anyways, I force myself to get over it and go back to trying to have a perfect relationship. And it is perfect. We are happy, and I truly love him a lot, more than anything in the world. It's been the best two years of my life but this trust thing threw some wrenches in it and he hasn't lied about anything lately, and I built my trust back up.

Then today I used his phone to search something and he had searched "how to fatten up your girlfriend" so once again, I am back to square one. He just walked in and handed me a letter (that is insanely insanely long) and it says all this stuff about how he's sorry and I'm his world and he is an idiot for breaking my trust and blah blah blah, it's pretty much the sweetest thing anyone could ever write to anyone.

I love him. He loves me. But he has lied. What do I do?