Sounds productive. I learned to "love" myself by starting to appreciate my body and head for all it does "automatically". All the defenses and ways I do things, they are to help me cope better! So, they should be appreciated. Think of if someone were going to hit you, how you would, without thinking, throw your hand up to protect yourself? That's what defenses are and we pick/choose our defenses that fit us and what we see as threats. We're good at it too because we're still here!