i am kind of lost and i don't know what to think or do.so much of a part of me doesn't want to talk to her at all.it kind of isn't a fear this time it is more of a power thing.i want to SI in a way to say F-you.but i would never tell her i did it.i want to go in there and say nothing just sit there.i don't know if this is because i am so disconnected with her right now for some reason i want to push the limits of our so called relationship.i just don't know but I'm scared that i am going to destroy our relationship tomorrow I'm going to get her furious with me. all i can think of is i want her to be .otherwise why am i wanting to do all this stuff.it like OK i don't need you ,i don't want you near me,etc... WHY?????