i don't know what went on but she was so nice today.i didn't know what to expect.in fact i thought she would cancel because of snow.when i got there she was downstairs at the desk.she opened the door for me and said, HI granite first off she never talks to outside of the office.but then she said she would be right back to get me and left.she came back in 5 min to get me.why does she always have to be 5 min late and what did she leave to do .anyway.she was just really nice during this session.she asked about my trip and i was able to talk.i told her that my son was his old self and all . i even was able to tell her some about what i learned about re-entry syndrome.she didn't tell me that my thoughts were wrong and that made me feel good.she was smiley and kind of light heartedand it felt good.i mean we didn't get into a bunch of deep misery and it felt great.we did talk about my step mother and her smoking and how unhealthy it was for me and my inability to say no to just about anyone .that i need to work on not worrying about getting people angry at me,or hurting there feelings.like my stepmother didn't give a crap that she was getting me sick with her smoking.that i need to say no to her.i said i never want to travel with her again and my T was cute because she said she was going to draw up a contract and hold me to that.i mean she was joking but she was serious about the being able to say no to others.she asked me if i ever say no or if i feel i need to always say yes.i didn't know how to answer.so i said maybe.the time went bye way fast .i was even able to look at her.in fact i found myself looking down at the carpet and i didn't want to be i actually wanted to look at her.she seemed to have a very kind face today.not very scary.i really don't know what made the difference but it was nice to be able to really look at her and not be scared.and i didn't seem to care if she looked at me either..i just can't say how comfortable it was. when it was time for me to leave she said that she would see me next wed and then told me she was going to be gone on the 21 of march.i said she better write it down.she then said that we had three weeks and i said ya sure until in two weeks i tell her she never said anything she than jokingly said it OK I'm taping it and smiled.it was so nice when i am able to joke around a little with her.she didn't get mad at me.she understood. i wonder if she would stay this way if i ever figured out a way to talk to her about my past