|
My goal for tomorrow is to go swimming at an indoor pool. If I actually succeed in making myself do it, then I might believe there is hope for me and all is not lost. Spending so much time in bed, depressed, has me feeling weak. I really do need some physical rehab to be able to regain the ability to maintain some normal level of activity. I got so run down, it is hard to even leave the house to buy a loaf a bread. It is hard to take out the trash. I don't have the strength to vacuum or stand at the sink long enough to do more than a few dishes.
So I was going to join a gym, but didn't have much interest in it. Then I got the swimming idea. That used to always make me feel happy. I hope it still works. Something tells me that this could be the key to unlock the door of the prison that I've been in. It's such a bad place to be and I want to get out so badly. I had been thinking that I would give up my life just to get out. Then I had to go out to the bank, which was hard to do, and while out - I remembered I would only have to take a short detour on my way home to visit the fitness center. Something told me to just go look at the pool. I did, and now I can't wait to get into it.
|