I'm not sure what i am needing right now .I'm feeling like i didn't want to talk in T. leading up to my session i had the feeling of defiance and anger.i didn't want to talk at all .i don't know what was going on but now i am feeling betrayed and tricked.i know that it is completely stupid that i feel this way and i am trying not to pay any attention to this and start spiraling out over this but don't know how well it will work.I'm going out shopping or something to keep my mind from running.

i guess maybe i am needing some reassurance that my T was genuine and not trying to trick me into sharing things that are not OK,dangerous.i can't believe that i am feeling these feelings.i mean i know in my head that it was an OK session .it was safe.but I'm not trusting it.she talked to outside of the office, she doesn't do that.it set me off guard.did she do that on purpose.she is hardly ever downstairs when i show up and if for some reason she is she never says anything to me at all.this time she was even at the door ,opened it for me,said hi granite,smiled at me.said she would be right back to get me and left to her office and came back in 5 min.she was so nice to me the whole time.

i want to accept this for what it seems to be but my head is screaming DANGER,DANGER.not safe at all that i went to far.isn't this all stupid.i swear I'm just hopeless