Okay, I know this has been discussed here a lot. I'm sorry to bring it up again!

I am just having a hard time. This week has been hard. Lots of self-loathing and so so sad. I feel disconnected from T. She seems far away and I am doubting her care of me. It feels like I bother her and am a waste of her time. And I know, these are only feelings, and T often says "feelings lie."

I KNOW this but cant shake the icky stuff. I want to call just to know she is there and connect. Next Thursday is a lifetime away from now.

Will I be bothering her if I call? I know no one here can really answer this. I'm sad.