You must have to also consider how you're approaching the situation? Are you already defensive when a conversation begins? Remember that tension and negativity is contagoius. If these males are at their teenage years then I would only assume that they are at a point in their lives that they are exploring their own thoughts and views of the world around them. I believe that people tend to fight about topics and not issues. does your family tend to have communication problems anyway? When males communicate it tends to be black and white and blunt. For most females they don't understand this and makes it hard to be understanding. Have you sat down and talked to these men in your life and letting them know in a mature, non-defensive manner that EVERYONE including yourself need to improve on their communication skills.