You should find a therapist/social worker. It's really the best option. I understand if you don't want to but it helps. I hate talking to people about personal issues and I try to avoid it at all costs but I realized if I want to get better I needed professional help. Look for one who specializes in Cognitive Behavior. And besides you learning coping skills for anxiety you may also be able to figure out if your past was troubled or not. I hope this helps.