I've had severe depression for 19 years. I've done every treatment known to man - meds, a bunch of different therapies, healthy self-care, the works. None have had any effect (well some meds did for a few weeks before wearing off). The therapies have all ended when the therapists got frustrated with me and put me in the "too hard" basket. It is really frustrating. I'm 30 now and I can truely say that I wish I had never been born - what a waste. I have a degree and all that jazz but when you are this mentally ill, it amounts to nothing - other than a huge debt ofcourse!

So I'm with this therapist right now. She is my last chance at therapy - where I live if you are on government assistance then the only therapy you can afford is through the community mental health scheme. So if she puts me into "the basket" then that's it for me - no more therapy. Unfortunately she has given up too but has yet to terminate my sessions (she will soon though - they all follow the same script when he comes to this). I figure I have about 3-4 sessions more before she terminates me.

What am I doing wrong??? I have done therapy BY THE BOOK - been proactive, taken control of my sessions, worked hard between sessions, bring in lists of stuff to talk about that I think might be relevant, everything! But all it ever does is make them angry. I do all the things that a responsible person should do whilst in therapy and they always get angry! I am perfectly willing to take what I learnt in there and apply it to my life outside of the session. But instead all the therapists do is get angry at me. I have no idea why - I am trying to do the right thing! Then when I ask (after 6 months or so) about my lack of progress, they say I am just not trying hard enough. WTF!!

I am THIS close --| |-- to saying "stuff it" and just stopping all treatment altogether. Stop all the treatment and let the chips fall where they may. I am sick to death of these "therapists" and their hypocrisy - I do all the right things and suddenly I have a "bad attitude". Is it REALLY that hard to say "look, I don't think I have the resources to assist you, so let me refer you to soandso who I think would be more appropriate" ??? Is it really that hard? Really? I used to LOVE the concept of therapy - I used to want to BE a therapist. Now that I have actually BEEN to therapy, that has all changed. Oh yeah - that has completely changed.