((((((Fuzzybear))))))

I know its hard not having someone agree with what we put down in our posts or in real life. I have learned that just because someone does not agree with what I am doing saying and so on is not always meant to be taken as they are judging me. they could be just stating their opinions of what the situation looks like from their point of viw. So when I come up against those that don't understand me or seem to be judging me I take the oportunity as a chance to look at things from a different view to see if I can incorporate new things that will help me in what I am going through. I also know just like in real life I can not please everyone.

Take for instance my blog -

not everyone agrees with what I write and some people feel the things I am writing about are abrasive, rude and that I am being plain out *****y in it.

I get many pms to my email adresses that I use for my online support goups to this effect alone with double that in the good emails.

At first I was highly offended at the rejections and so on and I tried to address each and every one of thier emails trying to prove to those that were against me why I am writing the way I am and what I was writing and where they saw me as the way they did.

I also objectively looked at things to see what I needed to do to change it so that they too would like what I write. One particular (or many posing as that one person) showed me I was not going to be able to please everyone.

So in the end I decided to use the ignore type feature and turned off the comments area. This not only took care of my having to read those rejection comments on the blog But it also protected my readers so that they were not contnuously emailing how upset reading such responses at that persons on my personal blog and were afraid I would stop writing my blog and have it deleted which would take away the help that my blog was doing for them and their therapy professionals.

I also decided to not change anything in the style and information and so on of my blog. My changing it to meet the rejecting persons point of view would have resulted in my blog leading others to believe things that were not true in my experiences and things that were not true in what the mentald disroder I was discussing - DID - was. Since I have chosen to have a blog on a mental health site run by professionals I have an obigation of keeping my blog not based on conjectures and misrepresentations of the disorder but based on varifyable facts of what that disorder is. And because it is my blog I have a responsibility to keep that blog on not only the truth but also on my experiences only.

That means that if the rejecting persons point of view conflicts with the varifyable truth of DID, I cannot lead readers to believe it is true and I cannot include that persons experiences as true in my blog.

the bottom line - Fuzzy is that no matter how hard a person trys they can never please everyone. So the best thing to do is just be yourself and do whats write for for you. There will be people on line that reject what they read no matter what it is.

And thats just a part of life. in real life we cant please everyone and it is real people behind the computer screnes. So real life attitudes and behaviors and so on come into the on line life also.

So when it comes to people judgig me I use it as an opportunity to see things in a new way but in the end there may be nothing I can do to change the situation. In those cases I just be myself and know that people can read what I like or not that is their choice and I can place them on ignore if there is nothing I can change and they are still being a pain in the you know what. Ignoring them takes their control of me out of their hands and into mine where it belongs. Back with me not being triggered and upset and my readers back to not being triggered and upset. I didn't like using that option but in life I can't please everyone and the same goes for on line so I dont bother trying to please everyone anymore.

So some call me aabraisive and a bewich and so on. I can't make them like me so why waste my time on them when I can be helping myself and others by keeping my blog as is right.

Take care Fuzzybear and do what you need to do and use the ignore when you need to.