Guys NEVER focus on any one when they are on the computer or watching TV.... they are in their entertainment box and they will not be able to give unto another until they leave that box and close its door.
Men compartmentalizing life and they can only take care of one box at a time.... there life is like a waffle and they will not (cannot) look into another square (box) when active in another one.... they have a different box for everything in their life - - - Work, Love, Friends, Family, Sex, Wife, Kids, Recreation, Relationships, Problems, Stress, Sleep (etc).

It sounds to me that your husband is depressed, hence therefore spending hours at a time on the computer and not giving to you or the kids (he is hiding).... and since guys do not like to fail he is placing the entire blame on you instead taking some of it upon his own head..... where it rightfully belongs.

Try checking this site out.... I think it will help you and him to understand each other and the needs you have as a man and as a woman.
LINK: http://4-womenonly.com/home.aspx

LoVe,
Rhapsody -