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Old Mar 03, 2012, 11:44 PM
Claritytoo Claritytoo is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2011
Location: Long Island NY
Posts: 1,272
Quote:
Originally Posted by amandalouise View Post
sure it can, going to therapy can have negative and positive affects on anyone, both the host (core) and alter, just like it can have negative and positive affects on non dissociative disordered clients.

that said I have some questions for you to think about -

how can a therapist do their job if they dont ask questions?
how can a therapist get to know you if they dont ask questions?
how can a therapist get to know what your internal system is like if they dont ask questions?
how can a therapist know if you have work related problems if the therapist doesnt ask questions about work?
how can your therapist know whether your alters have work related problems if they dont ask about jobs and purposes?
how can a therapist help your alters if they dont know which alters work and which ones dont, which alters do this and which ones do that?

basically thats what therapy is - you or your insurance is paying a treatment provider to sit there, listen to your problems, ask questions, help you fix your problems, help you find ways to have a more stable and happy life.

granted there are therapists out there that will just sit there and listen, say uh huh and Mmmmm a few times and the client just rambles talking about only things they want to talk about and avoid the hard issues.

but most if not all therapists that I have had ask lots of questions that will cause us to think about things like why are we here, what do we want in life, what are our problems, how can we get along together, ....

I only had one therapist that didnt ask questions and believe me it was a waste of my time and money to sit there while the therapist just Mmmmmm'ed and Uh Huh'ed.

therapy isnt always going to be happy, and untriggering. there is going to be times when you an your alters are challenged to think and work on those hard issues like why are your alters there, what are their jobs, purposes, what do you get out of having alters, and many other hard issues.

my alters never had a problem with my therapist asking questions. those that didnt want to go to therapy just didnt "pop out" or switched to another alter that could answer the questions.


here in NY / USA the mental health community believes that alters with DID already know why they exist. they are there because the host (core) could not handle the traumatic stuff that happened. they are there to take care of what ever the host could not take care of their self. whether they want to answer that question when the therapist asks it is another matter, sometimes my alters would answer and sometimes they would not.

here in NY /USA A therapist questioning them about their reason for being here is a standard question that is asked in therapy for DID. its a way to discover what the internal system is like, who does what job whats their purpose /reason for being there.
I am lucky, I have a good therapist who I hope will give me and my others the space to breath. My concern is not having my therapist ask questions. I wouldn't be going to a therapist to just sit there. My reason for expressing my concerns here is to see if anyone else has had the same concerns and share them with me. I have not been in therapy as long as you. I am some what new to my diagnosis. I am just trying to figure us out. Many of my alters have one job and that is it. They become extremely confused and some fearful when asked a question that causes them to feel incomplete. The one at my last session is complete in his mind. He knows his job and does it. When he is made aware of other possibilities he begins to question his existence. He was very confused and is unable to discuss things that are outside of his purpose. He can discuss his purpose to the extent of his knowledge. He can not be given information that pertains to the world outside his purpose. He is one dimensional in his existence. I have others who function in the world and can receive information when needed to address questions asked of them. I guess I have been feeling bad about putting them through this. I don't want to hurt them. I don't want them to feel incomplete. To a great degree it is the feeling of being incomplete that brought me to therapy. Right now he is needed at some point he will have to decide if he should stay or return. I am just trying to understand.
Thanks for this!
amandalouise, Gr3tta