Quote:
Originally Posted by elliemay
I do not believe in the whole parts idea. I think it stifles and splits the fact that you are one whole person - adult and with active agency in your own life. We all have aspects of ourselves that act differently. We all have different roles and behaviours that we exhibit given the situation.
It's not a pathology, it's us. Sometimes we may feel like we are opposite sides of the coin, but, bottom line, it is the same coin.
I think what is really at issue here is "what is my authentic, honest self". I believe that they all are. None of the emotions or reactions that we experience are false, but originate from us - a whole individual with adult and competent volition in our lives.
I know that some therapies encourage exploration of these parts, actually promote giving them names and independent voices, but the thing is, the thing that these therapies strive for is integration of these parts. In my opinion, they never were really separate to begin with. It's an exercise in spinning one's wheels in order to get to the same place.
Just my opinion, but the truth the way I see it.
|
Thanks elliemay - I want to be one person, I believe I am one person, or one "me" - and yes I can relate to that one authentic self - I thought I knew who I was but that has been blown apart over the last few years and I have been left feeling as I have been blown into many small pieces - actually an analogy has just come to me.
A china caup has a purpose, a function and a value, yet may originate from many things (actually I don't know how china is made, but guess it consists of more that 1 substance) - it is is dropped it becomes many small pieces, each one unrecogonisable, bearing no resemblance to that china cup - it can be pieced back together, but it may take time to examine each piece to see where it fits - so is this what happens with trauma? Our whole it broken, fragmented, split, but slowly we have to piece it all back together?
Also maybe the china cup was never put together well in the first place, maybe there were flaws in it already which made it more susceptible to breakage? And maybe that piece of clay(?) actually never wanted to be a china cup, it wanted to be a plate or a cute ornament on a shelf....I could go on
The whole prospect of examining a "part" of me is fairly terrifying which is why I am trying to get a better understanding to make it feel safer.