In response to your latest post, MoAnamCara:

If the events/experiences/feelings that you're having trouble talking about are affecting your life and your sleep, etc. they are a big deal and not insignificant. I know that it sometimes feels as though you are failing--maybe as if you aren't "doing therapy" correctly. Let me assure you; if you're in therapy to improve yourself and your life and you are doing your best, you are doing it right! You are so brave to be working through therapy!

If there are more memories that you aren't recalling right now, or ones that you may not be recalling in much detail, they may surface later on. The good news is that your T will be there with you every step of the way.

As far as things that were "consensual", if you were a child, it is literally impossible for a child to consent to anything sexual. Children possess neither the capacity to understand nor consent to any sexual act with an adult. If you were an adult, many actions are motivated by conditioning from abuse. Be kind to yourself. I agree with Sannah, the only way out is through.

The thoughts, memories, and dreams seem like they may be indicative of PTSD. I would ask your T about this.

If you start to think that you're not doing well enough, or that it's your fault, or anything of concern, I would really, really encourage you to talk to your T about it. He or she will help you. Always remember, no one deserves to be abused and it is NOT your fault!