I'm sorry that you are suffering so much right now.

After reading your post and your statement that you two are very good friends...well, it sounds very contradicting. It sounds as if he's not being a very good friend at all and that he just wants to push you away right now.

His depression is not your fault, and yes, it sounds very manipulative to tell you that it's all your fault. No matter what you've done in the past it doesn't mean he has the right to blame you for everything. He has responsibilities, too. And it sounds like he's refusing all responsibility in this situation.

My dad has always raised me that relationships take two and that things are to be shared. Now with that base to go on, it sounds as if this relationship is very one-sided. I mean you're doing all the work here...where is his effort to do anything but work and surf the net?

I would suggest couples therapy, definitely.

Hang in there.