Thank you both for seeing how horrible this situation is. I feel like everyone around me is downplaying it. He smoked it before we were married, but never regularly. More like, socially, instead of drinking. At the time I appreciated that, because my ptsd is triggered by being around drunk people and I wouldn't have felt safe if he were drunk. And he seemed soooo hardworking before we married, but as soon as we got married he stopped being that way and I became the breadwinner. He really doesn't think that anything he is doing currently is harmful to the baby or myself, let alone a sin against God. In the past, the only way he'd change anything was if he thought he was sinning. He holds it against me anytime I talk about separation that it would be against God for me to leave him, that it's in the Bible that I need to submit to him and follow his lead, etc. But he's leading us into devastation and it's also in the Bible that it's my job to protect and raise my children!