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Old Mar 05, 2012, 02:59 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
Big Poppa
 
Member Since: Oct 2011
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 19,616
Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow8 View Post
We've talked about it a lot in my sessions. My T says we have a "real relationship" though we're not friends or anything else other than T and client. She's a real person to me, and I like that person. She doesn't act like she's better than me; she's just herself. But now I don't trust that. I'm afraid my feelings for her are all transference feelings and that I'm betraying myself, if that makes any sense. Will it all come crashing down?
The fantasy can never be fulfilled, and it was painful for me to realise that. But underneath the fantasy relationship is a real relationship. Once I let go of the fantasy, I found the reality was pretty good too.

I had a fantasy that T would adopt me. In my head, I knew this was impossible, but my heart believed it. And my heart felt betrayed and destroyed when it realised the truth.

But the reality was that I loved her and she loved me, and for an hour a week I was the most important person in her life.

Rainbow, your feelings are coloured and exaggerated by transference. But there is a core that is real.

Yes, you can trust your real relationship with T.
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Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc.

Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
Thanks for this!
rainbow8, Sannah