dubble monkey
Quote:
...I didn't go to AA this weekend. I don't feel too worried about it either. I was not looking forward to it and therefore failed to remember that my meeting was on until two hours before. I decided immediately I didn't want to go....so I didn't go!
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not busting you, j, but i was told to go to a meeting when i didn't want to go and go to a meeting when i did. there's some logic here. we don't know what we've missed that may help us if we don't go.
i can totally relate to social anxiety  but these ppl in AA you know go thru similiar difficulties as you do in other ways perhaps. the importance of going is what counts even if you just go and listen. in early sobriety just showing up is what really matters.
as for your having difficulty sharing it will come when you're ready.
ok maybe i'm overly reacting but care for you so needed to say this. your sobriety may depend on it.
another analogy i was told...you didn't hesitate even in a snowstorm to get your hooch so apply that fact to gettin' to a meeting no matter what!
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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