I understand what you mean. I had a point in the interim of the emotions and thoughts hanging behind this where I though, “Well, what's the point of not doing whatever the hell I want; If I’m pissed enough, what does it matter if I were to kill someone? I may as well, what’s the point in holding back” But I would empathize for the parents/relatives/friends of said person who grieved afterwards. All it would be is perhaps an animalistic instinct relieved, but this train of thought has passed and society also presents us a consequence whether or not the action truly is meaningful.

If I were to become so enraged (and I can’t imagine actually reaching this point having been so inhibited the majority of my life) that I actually did have the true physical desire to kill someone, I would either have to take up a life of running and hiding, or face what I had done in prison after the fact. Neither is a scenario that I would particularly enjoy living, at present much less so than living with whatever person caused me to feel such rage against them. Thus, in Not killing them, I Am doing whatever I want. Because I do not want to go to jail. If the laws of the land did not prosecute a person for such actions and we lived in a more tribal society, where life holds less significance to the populace and we could take another person’s life over a dispute and it would be settled, I would have much fewer qualms about it and would be more likely kill said person.