I just got back from seeing the pdoc. The Seroquel isn't seeming to help. So he gave me a prescription for Tegretol. I go see him again in 2 months.

I get no therapy, meaning I have no therapist. I go to this place and I've lost track of how many meds I've been given prescriptions for. And I am told there are a bunch more that can be tried. Since September of 2010, I have been given prescription, after prescription, after prescription. So that's 18 months, now. I went in-patient in mid-January. It was awful. Since I got sent home from my job assignment in early February (as too incompetent to continue working there,) I've been in really rough shape. But I don't break the law, or bother anyone. So how much of a mess I am is just too bad for me.

My pdoc is a 4rth year resident. He seems like an okay guy. I feel like something is missing in what comes out of me going to this psych treatment facility. He told me that, if I am not willing to continue with how things are, then maybe I might want to just not come back.

I feel very bad.

I think I may go to bed. That's giving up. I wish I was not just giving up, but right now that's all I've got in me. I wish the doctor could have understood.